Landy Peek (00:35)
So many women are living in a level of stress that feels completely normal. The pace, the pressure, the constant holding, it becomes so familiar that we stop questioning it, even when it's costing us. But what if the problem isn't just what you're carrying? It's that you were never taught how to resource yourself in the middle of it. Welcome back to the Landy Peak Podcast. This is your friend and host, Landy Peak.
And today I'm joined by Mary Lou Wren, a well-being practitioner, speaker, EFT tapping practitioner, kinesiologist, and mother of four based in Southwest England. Her work helps women understand the emotional and energetic patterns behind stress, overwhelm, and disconnection so they can begin to feel safer, more resourced, and more trusting in themselves.
Mary Lou shares a practical way to start working with your body, understanding the patterns that keep you stuck, building real self-trust over time. This is a conversation you won't want to miss, let's dive in.
speaker-0 (01:32)
am so excited to have Mary Lou Wren here on the Landy Peak podcast. Mary Lou, can you share a little bit about yourself so the listener can get to know you?
speaker-1 (01:43)
Yeah, of course, I'm delighted to be here. Thank you for having me. As you can hear by my accent, I come from England. I'm down in the southwest, down by the sea. I have four children running from 16 up to 28. And I call myself an energyologist, which is an individual name. What that means is I'm trained as an EFT tapping practitioner and a kinesiologist. And
My work particularly focuses on midlife women as one of myself, thus ending menopause now. And I'm really looking at the terrain of the energetic and emotional terrain that we all hold. So it's really those internal stories and narratives that shape our life, that shape our stress and how we choose to respond to life difficulties. And then I work with the nervous system and EFT and embodiment and meditation.
to help resource and bring you back to self-trust and stability.
speaker-0 (02:46)
I love the bring back to self trust and stability because I think so many of us in this midlife space lose some of that self trust as our bodies are changing and we're not feeling like ourselves and we're exhausted and we're overwhelmed. And in this life stage, we have our careers, we have kids, we have parents that may be aging. There's a lot of stressors coming in.
and it's hard to navigate. As we begin, would you share about what EFT is so everyone listening can understand what we're talking about?
speaker-1 (03:29)
So EFT stands for emotional freedom technique. we're working, we tap around the body whilst exploring emotional blocks or limiting beliefs. And the act of tapping is we're actually tapping on meridian endings. Now meridians are a river of energy that runs through your body. So depending how you focus on the world, say I look at Eastern medicine and it comes from traditional Chinese medicine. And if you have enjoy
pressure or acupuncture, they are using meridians. They are tapping into this internal chi, prana, or this life force within you. So for those that are more subscribed to Western medicine or science, whilst for a decade they went, no, they don't exist, they have now actually mapped them, I think electronically, thermographically, and they call them the primo-vascular system.
And it's been shown that the act of tapping is very highly evidenced by an amazing, I think she's Australian lady called Peter Stapleton. And it's been shown that the act of tapping on these endings and the kinetic action, it travels through the connective tissue or your collagen and goes directly to your amygdala. And your amygdala is your fight and flight center, it's your motherboard. And so it kind of rewires those neural pathways and helps to soothe the nervous system.
You don't have to believe in it for it to work. What I love about it is it's really powerful on a one-to-one because we can go deep into those beliefs and traumas, whether they be big T or little T traumas. You can use that as a group. But also what I love particularly about it, which I kind of added on to my kinesiology, was it's fantastic to take home. So it's a very simple technique. I mean, for me, it really came into its own in
perimenopause when the flushes were starting to calm and with that became all the anxiety, which I hadn't, I'm not a particularly anxious person before. And so it was like, what the heck is happening? I don't know how to navigate this. It's really alien to, you know, one minute be fine and the next I'm in tears and my friends were like, what is going on? So tapping or some kinesiology techniques I had really helped to kind of give that body that breath and bring you back. And what I will say about EFT.
is while talk therapy works wonders for some people, it's what we would call a top-down therapy. So you're coming through the mind, you're having to articulate, give some understanding or context to your situation, your emotions. And often you're not able to do that, especially in trauma. There's a part of the brain on the left side called the broccus area, which actually shuts down in trauma. So you're not able to find those words to articulate.
And again, what I love about EFT is we call it a bottom up therapy. So we're coming through the body. So it's when you think of this event or when you're feeling anxious, where are you feeling that in your body? And I think that's very lost. I think by the time you get to our aid, as you say, we're navigating children, families, work, elderly parents, menopause. You know, our plate is really full.
the thought of actually listening to what we need is like, you know what, that's the last thing I can do. I've just got too many things to do. But I think it's, I was gonna say it's an art form, but I would say it's more of a necessity to really honor us and give ourselves that space. And one of my favorite phrases, you cannot give from an empty cup. So we can't resource ourselves, and I was brought up as a Catholic.
I buy a quite old fashioned mum and it was like my feelings were irrelevant. We give, you're being selfish, you give to everyone else. And if again you're brought up with that sort of mantra or worldview, we don't meet our own needs. But actually, as they, I think, the top of the triangle in a family home or at work, if we're not, if we're not regulated, if we're not calm, you can't look after the people underneath you.
You can't resource them, you can't hold space for them if we don't hold space for ourselves.
speaker-0 (07:46)
Absolutely. And I love that kind of highlighting that viewpoint that if we are not resourced ourselves, then we can't be a resource for others. And so many of us live our existence being a resource for everyone else. And I'm sure a lot of us, if not all of us have felt that we are stressed, we are overwhelmed, we are overtired, and we're barely holding on.
and there's that one thing that happens, the kid tantrums or somebody snaps or there's bad traffic and all of a sudden we feel like we're losing it. And in that, that's where our cup is empty. We have no more resources and I look at stress and I'm curious and I wanna talk about how you see stress. But stress is really that we have more demands than we do for resources. And this is an incredible resource that we can bring in.
to support our systems in the moment when we're feeling overwhelmed and be able to start to shift. And I agree, a lot of talk therapy, we don't have that capability to have the verbal process to talk it through, but we feel it in our body. And when we're working with that, can happen.
speaker-1 (09:06)
know that we experience an event. You let's say I often use a simple example of a dog bite. You know, if you're fearful of dogs now and you were bitten by a dog when you were eight. So we know all this happened and I'm scared of dogs, but your body will remember events on all the senses. What it sees, what it senses, what it tastes, what it's feeling. So even if you weren't able to verbalize, I know I was bitten by a dog, but I can't actually remember what happened. But I do remember I just had a chocolate ice cream or it was a really hot day.
or that a really noisy train went past. So sometimes you can access those memories, which are like the table legs that once you wipe those out, that tabletop, that belief will fail, will drop. You can access it even though on that really hot day, when I just had a chocolate ice cream with that noisy train, I know I was really scared. And your body's sort of memory, you know, the body holds the score.
So you can access it in lots of different ways like that. So I just think that somatic conversation can be really powerful.
speaker-0 (10:10)
When our bodies are in that heightened stress response, right? It's like we're nearing that focus and our body is just focusing on the survival and this is the big thing and the big things come in through our senses, not through the logical thought process. That's why we're all horrible historians during a traumatic event because we're not picking upon all the little things. We're not thinking about
everything that's going on, our brains are hyper focused. It's like it blew up that image really, really big. We're hyper focused on those senses and survival. And so our brain is giving us the best chance of survival, which may not be as we look back, the best response that we would have wanted to make. But your brain's like, we survived. Can you talk about
the nervous system and stress and what's going on there.
speaker-1 (11:12)
or so many angles I could take. I'm going to take the meridian angle. Okay, there are 40, 14 meridians in the body. 12 of those are connected. And they're all named after organs. You have the smaller, smaller intestine meridian, the heart meridian, the lung, the liver, the large intestine. And then you have two systems which aren't organs, they're called the triple warmer and the circus.
And the triple warmer is the meridian involved in the survival response. That's its job. ⁓ And I offer giving talks, we'll speak about it. Do remember the film Jumanji?
speaker-0 (11:51)
Yes.
speaker-1 (11:53)
Yeah. And you had the the pick helmets had kind of hunter within that with his big gun and he was like really focused on whatever happened. He was hunting, hunting, hunting. And that's what the triple warmer meridian is like. It's a hunter. It's your protector. And it's doing an awesome job. But it's just kind of forgotten that the threat no longer exists. And so it's great. And as we know, it's often referred to also ⁓ stress like the modern tiger.
Primarily, you know, we're looking for the tiger who say we're hyper focused, what needs to happen right now for me to survive. And the modern stress is WhatsApp messages can be EMF can be the demanding boss can be the kids. All these things are keeping us in survival mode. And I think we're so used to it. And as women, we do such an awesome job of juggling it all. We kind of forget or kind of disassociate
the stress that we're feeling. feels normal. It shouldn't feel normal, but this load is familiar. So we think it's normal, but familiar doesn't, know, they don't equate in my mind. So the triple warmer is kicking off and it's working all the time. So it's doing its job. On one hand, great. But when it doesn't stand down, it causes problems. So the triple warmer is allowed to resource itself.
through every other meridian power source in the body, other than the heart, not allowed to touch the heart. But the first meridian it ⁓ draws from energetically is the spleen. And the spleen is huge about taking blood around the body, digestion, but most importantly, the immune system. So again, we know looking primarily, running away from the tiger, we don't need to procreate, we don't need to eat, we don't need to menstruate. So all those systems shut down.
So there's the triple warmer, not turning off, not turning off and sucking almost the life out of us. So I think when we have these long-term stresses, which are creating discomfort, distress or dis-ease within the body, down the line, you then create literal manifest physical disease. So I had a client who had ⁓ multiple sclerosis.
And we look at timelines in the work I do is like just all the significant events in your life and it could be illness, could be stress, divorce, money, whatever it is, moving, job, what was happening around the time of your diagnosis with MS. So she was in the middle of a 10 year period with both her parents and her in-laws. And in her words, they had every geriatric illness, know, stroke, heart attack, dementia, and they, her and her husband were
space for 10 years. And that is kind of yes, the space we're in women our age, but she had a particularly relationship with her narcissistic mum. So her trauma had gone back for decades and it was very conflicting having to look after her. So it was no surprise that to the stress she'd been enduring quietly, emotional lack of safety, which I can relate to for my own experience, then compounded in
emotional and physical and mental stress of having to care for this very, very tricky woman. And then multiple sclerosis comes in. So I look at those chronic illnesses and cancer or diseases and illness in a metaphysical way. So, yes, we know that this particular part of your body may not be working, but energetically what's happening? You know, is it the load you're carrying on your shoulder?
Is it your spine, which again is about support or breast, which is about nurturing sets of understanding that whilst we do an awesome job and whilst it well, it would be nice to give myself time. It would be nice to have a full cup, but I just. It's the grace of understanding that when you're holding this stress. Very. I'm in for it in my opinion.
speaker-0 (16:09)
of how you're stepping back and looking at the timeline. And you really highlight how stress is, yes, familiar, but not normal. And as we're not resourcing ourselves and it kind of ignoring and pushing through, you're seeing that as we can support ourselves when stress is beginning or stress is more... ⁓
Consistent, but not to the physical manifestation yet of disease, this is where, and this is what I'm hearing, this is where we need to be talking about. How we can start supporting our and resourcing ourselves before we end up in disease.
speaker-1 (16:53)
It's you're looking at difference between the West and Eastern medical mindset. Okay. is reactive and more symptoms, whereas the Eastern medicine is preventative and goes to the cause. So when you're having you're in the bar, having massages, that's all about. That's, I fancy a day at the spa, training your body that's doing the acupuncture to keep
What we as a kinesiologist would call homeostasis, you're keeping that balance in order for it not to manifest in disease. So it's not a nice to have. It is, in my opinion, necessity.
speaker-0 (17:33)
Can you talk about grounding in how we can kind of bring in, we hear the idea around stress, around our nervous system, around self-care in that we need to be grounded or that we need to ground ourselves. Can you talk around what is grounding and what it might be doing for us?
speaker-1 (17:59)
So I'm going to be a little woo now and I'm going to start talking about chakras. OK. So again, for those that don't know, the chakra system actually is part of the meridians. It's seven energy centers mainly that go from right down the base of your spine to your belly, which is your sacral, then comes up to your solar plexus, your heart, your throat, the third eye on your brow, and then your crown chakra.
And again, this is traditional Chinese medicine and the chakras feed the energy to the meridians. So it's kind of all the same thing, but each chakra has a particular energy or job. And the base chakra, which actually is between your legs, is all about safety, which is my bag. And it's about ⁓ tribal connection. It's about the I am presence, about belonging. It's about financial security. I also kind of
see it as part of that motherhood wound and it's about safety. So when you're grounding yourself, and there are different ways you can do it, you can literally just take your shoes off and put your feet on the grass, on the sand, on the mud, and make that connection to the earth, connecting to all the negative ions which is feeding you. The earth has a magnetic, we know we're electromagnetic beings, and so is the earth.
So when we connect in that way, we're literally balancing our energetic system with Earth. I like to do it with my clients through meditation. I ask them to imagine energetic roots coming out of their feet. And I'm a huge tree geek. So it's about seeing them as tree roots and having them spread sort of energetically, metaphorically into Mother Earth. And we can go through the rocks or the crystals, the oil, the really, really
getting that imagery and I think visualization is very powerful. And then you're really connecting to her energy and that helps to balance that root chakra. So when we're under stress and I have faced 20 years of adversity in one form or another, if I hadn't had that, if I hadn't taken time to breathe and ground, mean, to leg buckling moments, you're then destabling your base chakra and you can't show up.
You know, you're being reactive, you're being stressed. And not only do you have the physical consequences, but you can't at times through debt or illness or divorce. As a mother, it's hard to parent when you're like that. So it's discombobulating in every way. So that grounding for me is the fundamental. If I can teach anyone one thing, if you ground yourself,
and creates safety and stability is a little bit like my husband used to be a hard landscaper and he'd plant trees and he'd put the stake in and but it wasn't like really holding the tree firm when he strapped it together. The tree was still moving and I said do you is the whole point not to keep the tree really firm because it's a little sapling and it's going to you know be compromised by the wind.
And he said, no, you actually need the wind. It needs to bend because that's what encourages the root system. And that's what tells the tree it needs to grow a broad, wide root system. Because the root system of a tree is often twice the size of the boughs. Because if you think of the weight of the trunk and the boughs, so if you think of everything we're carrying, the deeper and wider our root system is, the more we can carry in life.
speaker-0 (21:41)
That is the most beautiful visual. And I have done grounding using the tree root image. That is one of my favorite ways to my feet on the actual ground barefoot and then also the visual of the roots going all the way down into mother earth. But I've missed that key part that the wind
The things that come in life that feel a little destabilizing are actually helping us grow a firmer, bigger, wider root base. it like, my- Yes, it's just this little flip of like, ⁓ okay. That wind that's coming in and making things a little bit unstable is helping me.
speaker-1 (22:22)
to.
speaker-0 (22:36)
than weather and carry different, have the more capacity to carry a different load as I go on in life. I absolutely love that. Thank you. You spoke around safety and I think a lot of us have this visual of like safety. I'm physically safe where I am. But can you talk about the emotional and energetic safety because I think
that's something a lot of we're just kind of blowing by and not really honoring.
speaker-1 (23:13)
So I've recently designed a protocol called the Infinity Protocol, which specifically looks at two different states, the state I'm in and the state I want to be. And because I work so heavily with safety, it kind of doubles down on this concept. So we use the infinity symbol. So that's the eight, like a number eight on the side. And it's a very ancient symbol. So that's really all about being able to look at those two issues. So I always use examples, say of doubt and self-trust.
So the doubt being the negative state and self-trust being the more expansive state. So it's allowing us to look energetically, emotionally around that kind of why they exist. And I kind of put a quadrant around that. And ⁓ we look at say doubt, why don't you like being in this state? Well, it makes me feel anxious. It makes me feel frustrated. So we look at kind of when we know that we know why we don't like it. We then look at the protector part.
which is where the safety part comes in. What's good about being in doubt? What's good about being stuck in this place? Well, it means I don't have to show up. It means that it's known, it's familiar. And again, we kind of know that. So then, let's say self-trust or expansion or success or I have a, know, everyone comes up with different versions. And what do you like about that? ⁓ you if I had that, would feel light and
and I'd be financially secure and I'd be welcome and I could help more people and this kind of fantasy of I can get the essence of it but not really hold onto it. I can see it but not quite touch it. And then in the last quadrant, diagonally opposite from the other protector part, if you really had this, what would you dread about it? What would be the bad thing?
And it would be like, oh, well, I'd be seen and I'd be visible and I'd have to, you know, people are going to hear me and then they might judge me. And often the common theme is people will lose me. They will abandon me. So then we bring tapping into this where we're looking at emotional blocks and we're speaking to those two protector parts, the two hunters, the two bodyguards that are saying,
In the past, you've been judged, you've been mocked, or it's been unsafe for you to grow, to shine your light, to be this. So I'm going to stop you doing that, not worth the risk. Too painful, it could be physically too painful, emotionally too painful. So my job is to keep you safe. What we do is when we're tapping, have a sequence I go through, but in essence, we're talking to those parts.
And often when we're looking at, in fact, I had a networking meeting this morning and the woman said, I should just, you know, I should just get over myself and just do it. And I said, ⁓ can I reframe that? Because I'm hearing judgment and you'll cross with yourself and there's this degree of I should and there's shame. And it's like, actually, they'll protect a part that's stopping you reaching or going up the ladder or whatever you want to see it expanding.
your protector part's doing an awesome job. That it's what it's made for because at one time in your life, it wasn't safe to step up, to grow, to be seen. So don't shame it, thank it. And so when we're tapping, it's like you've done an awesome job and you kept me safe. And sometimes for decades, people are stuck in behaviors and patterns. And so it's then during the tapping, it's like, but as you know, I...
I could be okay, you know, what would that look like if I did have that, you if you went up the rung of the ladder, if we did expand, that would feel quite good, wouldn't it? Or what if it was safe? So we start to bring loads of questions in and encouraging the protector part to become curious. I said, the hunter, he's out and he's doing his job. It's like, have you actually gone right back to barracks to check what the orders are, to check if the threat still exists?
So we kind of personify and have that conversation saying, I wonder if I did do that, would it be so bad or how would it feel? How would it look? And I was using an example this morning. It's a bit like a valve. You know, it's flicking from left to right. And when we regulate, we're flicking that valve. I love regulation and vagal nerve and havening technique and grounding. And it will last to a point. But when you have these deep wounds, you're asking your protector part.
to flick into everything's okay, right now it's okay. And the protector parts think, well, this is historic and it's been going a long time and I've been doing this for a long time. So you have to really honor it and allow it curiosity to thank it, accept it and if it were a person to have it sort of looking to the right going, well, I see that, but I'm not quite sure. I'll look again. Yeah, I'm quite curious, but I'm not too sure. And you have to keep.
from oiling that valve and giving it the chance to go, it might be all right. Well, if you say, yeah, okay, we could try that. And again, metaphorically, it's like taking the hand of your bodyguard and your protector part and saying, let's go together. Because I know that given the chance, you'll put your armor back on, you'll protect me. But right now, we don't need to do that. But I know that you're there if I need you.
But let's go and enjoy this. So you're easing it in. So and then that regulation, it will stick. It will stay. Does that make sense?
speaker-0 (29:15)
It makes complete sense. I love the visual of that infinity because it's not just something that's linear, right? One side or the other, but it is talking to this like roundabout way of like, let's touch in with the protector parts because they are there doing a job and they've done a really good job with it. And the thing that really highlighted in my brain as you said, it was, have you gone back and checked the orders? Is the threat still there?
I think we talk to the protective parts and we think about the protective parts, but I hadn't really clued into, wait, have we updated the orders? Because we can talk to them and guide them slowly, come here, come play with me. But if they're still, the threat is there, they're less likely to take off the armor. But if you're like, let's update those orders, the threat is no longer right there.
there's this ease in like, okay. And it is a back and forth, right? As you described of oiling that, that leather, it is that, okay, maybe it's not a force. It's not an override. It's not a disconnect. It's let's shift how we're seeing it, update the input and taking our time to get there. And I think that's huge because
as women that are on the go, we often want it like right now. Okay, I wanna like push ahead, jump ahead like the person you were talking about. We're gonna berate ourselves and you're like, wait, let's reframe this. And I think a lot of us need that moment to go, wait, let's reframe this.
speaker-1 (31:04)
I think for some women I've worked with, this protective part's been going for decades since childhood, often with a narcissistic mom, which is why I bring that motherhood wound into the base chakra. And even doing that work is sometimes not enough. And so I kind of give them a homework, saying when you're doing something that you love, gardening or craft or yoga or meditating, kind of call your protective part going, right now I'm safe.
just notice right now I'm safe. And it's got to become familiar with that feeling of what safety is. Because it's like, let's say it's on the parapet, looking out at the, you know, through the periscope. And it's like, just turn, you stay there, I get you're doing a job and I get you're not ready to stand down, but just become curious about in this moment I feel safe. So that becomes familiar. So whilst we can do it in the concept of this infinity protocol,
Sometimes it takes daily reminders because it's ingrained. And if women in their 50s, if you're going for five decades, you're not going to snap out of it. Again, you can regulate. You can have reiki. You can do meditation or sound healing, all of which I think are awesome. And you feel better when you come home. But it will take one phone call from the mother, one berating from the boss, one, oh, I've mumbled over my words. Everyone hates me. And it flicks you straight back.
So it's having to, you know, this is what I it is the work. All of this is conscious and mindful investment in our emotional and energetic wellbeing. And I still have to do it. You know, I still have to show up for myself going, I could spiral, but I have all my tools, my flower remedies, my crystals, my samples, my EFT, my walking in nature. Which one do I need today? Which one serves me to bring me back into to, um,
Haemiostasis and Balance.
speaker-0 (33:04)
I'm so glad you brought that up because as I have worked with women, there's this idea of I am going to be healed and done with this. And then I'm like shifting out, I'm a whole new person. I'm never gonna have to deal with this again. And then life happens and we end up feeling like we're back at the same spot and we're not because we have more resources.
and we've shifted in our nervous system so we're not as reactive as we were. But this is not something that we're going to be finished with. This is a life experience and we just are able to fill that toolbox, be more resource where it can be, okay, this is coming up, which is going to be best used today. I'm no longer reactive at all.
I'm never gonna deal with stress again. I'm gonna be healed from all my traumas. It's really what I'm hearing from you is we need this variety of resources to be what would best support me right now.
speaker-1 (34:16)
My umbrella term for my work is rooted energetic sovereignty because it's about taking responsibility. And I think as a society, we can feel quite disempowered. I'm going to go out and find someone else to fix me. I don't heal anyone. just give, as you say, I give them the tools to resource themselves. I'll walk the journey with you. I can be the guide, but you have to choose to be the traveler.
And underneath that umbrella term, I have the three pillars, is grounding, gratitude and grace, which helped me through, you know, all the adversity I've had to face. So the grounding is that stabilizing the base chakra. The gratitude is really, at my hardest times, being grateful for the most simple things. I mean, we could talk about heart math and the power of the heart and all of that, but it's really being able to change the narrative of, I've got to
that I can put on for my kids. They're really, really simple, basic things that the people who have really struggled, whether it be a divorce or death or so many different things, when it's like, as a mom, I just need to look after my family. Hanging out, my washing is my favorite thing at my hardest time because it meant I had bed sheets. I had a bed, I had the bed sheets, I had the electricity to wash it.
and I had a garden to hang it and I had the sunshine or the wind to dry it. And it sounds silly and simple, but when about six years ago, were financially, it was very, very hard. And my husband had depression. He suffers from chronic pain after a spinal stroke 16 years ago. And, you know, it was fragile. And it was like, if you can feel the gratitude, the universe then brings you more to feel grateful for, in essence. And Greece is the last one.
is, I suppose it's a little bit like the 12 steps, but I've never done them, but it's really connecting to your own higher self, to your intuition, to a force greater than yourself. Because when things get tough, it can feel very lonely, especially as a woman, when we're busy re-enforcing other people and holding them. And often we're, you know, if you're not reaching out for help, it can feel very lonely. So for me, it's being able to connect whatever your faith is or
For me, can be nature is my church. I was raised a Catholic, but it was quite toxic. So I more have a spiritual connection and just bringing that in. And even if you don't have a faith, there is a part of us that knows better that the monad, the higher soul that's been here before, is our champion. And it allows us to have a clearer support system without this.
the fault lines and fears I was talking about earlier, the narratives, the behaviors, the traps that we set for ourselves. And I think often we think I need to have stuff. I mean, know that like EFT and all these things are resources, but if other people can give me this stuff, then I'm okay. But often I think we have an inner diamond and it's actually getting the mud and the layers off that to reveal what we knew all along that we have the resources.
We have the connection, we have the capacity for love and connection, but we just have to drop all the SH1T that we have put on ourselves and judged ourselves with.
speaker-0 (37:50)
just in I am not the healer, I am not healing you, that you are walking alongside someone and you can be a resource, but it is inside each one of us. And just to have those pillars coming in where we're grounding and we're giving ourselves grace and we're connecting to whatever in our belief system. I, like you, was raised Catholic and very much nature is my church. ⁓ but in that,
space. It is not just a one focus that we are trying to support ourselves, but you're using this multifaceted, higher level, grounding inside of us, ⁓ understanding, speaking to our parts and those protectors. It really is this incredible dynamic resource that is shifting how we view ourselves.
and allowing us to have more understanding of what's going on. It's incredible.
speaker-1 (38:56)
Bless you. Thank you. It's kind of why I use that energyology because it is all those different layers and it's quite hard to explain what I do. But it's like there are so many levels to us and it's appreciating and understanding them. I had a client who was ⁓ in a cancer journey, ⁓ started about two years ago, and she wasn't particularly holistic. It was doing traditional treatment.
welcomed my help. And so I started introducing her to EFT and meditation and grounding and I used to do a little sound journey with her because she'd visit me in person. And I always use her phrase, the delight on her face. She said, you opened a doorway to my being I didn't know existed. And that's kind of, again, I'm just got goosebumps. If everyone understood the talking to themselves and understanding themselves on a different level, she'd
She'd feel the sound bowls. I would use the shamanic drums and say, can feel, I can feel the warmth coming through my body. So for me, we're all vibrational beings. So by tapping, you're using vibration by the language you use. So again, the ground and gratitude and grace is all about. ⁓ And the meditation, visualization, the power in that, the power the body has to heal. And
we would personify her tumor and talk to it and it was hurting and they'd say, what's it saying? It's like, you're stressed. If you're stressed, I'm going to hurt. And it was just this capacity she had, she'd come in fearful, something would have happened or a mindset and she'd leave you sort of floating, you know, but it wasn't, it wasn't me. I was just going, actually, you have this. Open yourself up, open every level of yourself up to what you're saying.
to if we're doing meditation and talking to loved ones, to what they're saying, to the grounding, to the music, to the crystal. And her, this inner diamond could feel it. It was almost like coming home in a way. I recognize that because it makes me feel calm. So if I can open all those doors, going to people, look, look, look, there are all these ways that your body will recognize it. You know, take that journey, be curious, but it's...
Again, it's a journey. You have to keep visiting it because life happens. We're here to experience all of it. You know, the good, the bad and the ugly. So, but that's part of it is being able to come back to self and shine that inner diamond.
speaker-0 (41:33)
I love the inner diamond. my gosh. I could just talk to you all day. You're so incredible. Is there any last ideas or words that you would love to share with the listener?
speaker-1 (41:45)
Very
kind. I've said so much of what I believe. I think it would have been grounding, but I've talked about that. But I like to end when I do meditation, of with the, with the thanking myself and the, and the I am. So I always sort of thank who I am in this moment for showing up for me, for my family. And I'll often say to myself, you know, I just believe in being my own champion. So I don't mean this in an arrogant or egotistical way.
But it's picking out, it's like, I'm a good person, I'm a kind person, I'm a curious person, I'm a powerful person. So it's just saying sort of five to 10 powerful I am statements. Also then thanking the past version of me that's kind of got myself to where I am now. The resilient part of me, the courageous part of me, the nurture in me. And actually all the circumstances that have happened that have been hard and good.
that have made me the person I am today. Because without the diversity that I faced, I definitely would not be, you know, to have the mindset or the worldview I have now. And also, I then thank the future version of me, the person I'm leaning into becoming, because we never stop learning. And it's, you know, we can take wisdom from them. So it's not quite carrot and stick. We don't want it, but it's, I'm never going to be this person I want to be. This is the person I'm growing into.
and thanking them, the future me, for being brave enough to take that step and to show up for myself.
speaker-0 (43:21)
What an incredible way. And I, like you, love that internal talk and thank you and gratitude. But I have not thanked my future self. I have thanked the present one. I have thanked the past one. But that future one, the one that I am becoming, thanking that version, feels so good as I'm talking about it. And I want to thank you, because I had not clued into that. And that is like,
such a pivotal part of our journey.
speaker-1 (43:55)
Yeah, and it's often I've been on a weight loss journey. I did a detox in September and I've been doing keto for months and I've lost a healthy amount of weight and I feel awesome. But it's the tenant for me is what would my future self thank me for? So I'm doing it because I want to, you know, be fit and able and do that. So even in the morning, if I'm having breakfast and I kind of want to crack on and get to my desk and it's like my future self will thank me for doing the washing up now because she's not going to want to do it at five o'clock.
So it's little things like that where I then come in to go and cook dinner at six going, hey, look at that. You know, the kitchen's clear. I don't have to clear up because I made that decision for my future self. So you can make it quite macro and micro in lots of different ways.
speaker-0 (44:41)
I'm stealing that because that is powerful. What would I think before? Cause as I look through even my morning this morning, I'm like, Ooh, there's some things that I could have done that my future self would have thanked me for that I didn't choose to do because it's like, ⁓ I'll do it later. And that just flips the script from something that's like, ⁓ now I've got to like do this and do this. What would my future self thank me for? And then it's doing it in this whole different energy.
⁓ you're amazing.
speaker-1 (45:12)
We're reinforcing us, we? It's almost like having our kid or our husband do it. And it's like, actually, I know that I get stressed if my kitchen is messy or my bed is not made or for people who meal prep. You know, that's just the most awesome way of like, I'm to cook all my meals on a Sunday. I can never manage to do it myself. But, you know, every night you're free. I mean, that's like the biggest gift. It's it's mothering ourselves really, isn't it?
speaker-0 (45:36)
it is. It absolutely is. I know that there so many people that are loving this conversation and want to continue it with you. How can people connect with you?
speaker-1 (45:50)
Well, my website is marilouren.com. For those of you who know my name, it's M-A-R-I-L-U, Ren like the bird. Or they can do Linktree, marilouren, and that will show lots of different ways. I'm running in, what month are we now? In May, I'm running, I'm creating a four week program around the Infinity Protocol, which basically teaches you how to use that and then you kind of get a PDF resource at the end.
So we do, we work in the moment. That's the third week we do that. And then you get a resource about how to use that. I think I've got three different settings for that. I know I've got a US friendly one. I think it's starting on the third, I think it's a Sunday. And that's ⁓ 4 p.m. my time. So think that's nine or 10 year old time. So if they look up all the sources, I'm gonna start advertising that soon, because I'm still making it.
But yes, I'm always crazy. I'm on school as well. Do you do school in America? SKOOL? School Community? I do.
speaker-0 (46:52)
Yes, actually there are other people that do.
speaker-1 (46:55)
So it's a community, it's like a very simple version of Facebook. So it's called EFT and Energy Healing. So I have loads of free resources on there. I've got an energy masterclass. ⁓ Yeah, lots of things on there. So people at Horan School, they can check me out on there too.
speaker-0 (47:10)
That's incredible. And I will have all of your links down in the show notes and you have a free tapping guide. Is that correct?
speaker-1 (47:17)
They do. So often people will say, I don't know what to say in tapping and I don't know where to tap or how to set it up. So I've really tried to break it down into steps to creating a setup statement to really have that somatic conversation of where you're holding the emotions. So for people who haven't tapped before, I think there's a link in there to show you there's a video for me tapping. Yeah, and that's like a nice way to start. Or again, if they look...
If you look at my link tree, there's like a how to tap guide and I think on YouTube, I kind of put lots of stuff everywhere. So put in my name really, and I pretty much show up.
speaker-0 (47:55)
Put in your name and you can find us. Thank you so much. We're such an incredible connoversy.
Landy Peek (48:01)
As you're leaving this conversation, just notice what stood out. Not everything, just the one thing that felt true to you. Because this isn't about doing more or getting it perfect. It's about starting to resource yourself differently in the middle of your real life. Whether that's grounding, tapping, or simply asking, what would my future self thank me for? That's where this work begins. You can connect with Mary Lou and explore her resources down in the show notes. I want to thank you for being here, for showing up for yourself, for doing something incredible for you.
I see you. know sometimes how hard it can be to carve out that time just for you. And I really appreciate that you're here. I want to wish you all the happiness that today can bring and I will talk to you in the next episode.
Speaker 2 (48:43)
Hey, before you go, just a little bit of legal. This podcast is designed for educational purposes only. It is not to replace any expert advice from your doctors, therapists, coaches, or any other professional that you would work with. It's just a chat with a friend, me, where we get curious about ideas, thoughts, and things that are going on in our lives.
As we're talking about friends, if you know someone who would benefit from a conversation today, please share because I think the more that we open up these conversations, the more benefit we all get. So until next time, give yourself a big hug from me and stay curious because that's the fun in this world.
